Killer Dummy

Ted always dreamed that someday he would be a ventriloquist and that day finally arrived on his 50th birthday. One of his closest friends Bob decided since it was the big 50 and he would make his dream come true. Bob had his eyes on an antique ventriloquist dummy at his aunt’s antique shop. He told her to put it on hold so he could surprise his good friend Ted at his birthday dinner tomorrow. Bob was excited to be able to make his buddy Ted's dream come true. Bob gave his aunt the money for the dummy and got it gift-wrapped. Bob called Ted on the phone and told him he wanted to take him out for his birthday tomorrow.

Ted said, "I’ll be there."

Bob said, "I’ve also got a big surprise for you."

"Thanks, good buddy, I guess I'll see you tomorrow," replied Ted.

The day finally arrived and Ted was having a great time with his buddy Bob. Ted opened his gift and was so excited he said “Bob, this is a dream come true and now I can share it with the world and I owe you big time.” Bob replied “Bob said, “Don’t worry about it, you’re my best friend and I’m just happy I was able to make your dream come true.” After dinner was over the two men shook hands and Bob said “You’re going to be famous someday and don’t forget me when you do.” Ted replied, “Don’t worry I won’t.” Ted put the dummy back in its box got in his car and headed home to practice with the dummy until his eyes were too tired to see.

As Ted was driving down the road singing along with the radio he thought he heard someone call his name. He just ignored it and kept singing along with the radio then it happened again.

The voice said, "Hey stupid get me out of this box I can't breathe."

Ted said "I must be losing my mind. I thought I heard a voice come from the box."

"That's right stupid! Now get me out of this box before I kill you!

Ted cautiously opened the box and the dummy sat up looking at Ted directly in his eyes and said "You look as though you've seen a ghost."

Ted swerved to the side of the road and said "Dummies can't talk!"

"This dummy can talk and stop the car and listen to what I have to say?"